he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i just made my gag reflex go away.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize