It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
