I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
