I should be sponsored by Trojan
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
