I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
