I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
