I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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