plz talk dirty to me
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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