I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
