Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
dude i'm inner monologue high
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
