So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
