I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
