Your tits are I can't wait for
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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