I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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