question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize