I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
