Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Randomize
