he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize