dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
