So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
