U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
