My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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