I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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