no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
