I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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