Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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