do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
All I want is dick and wine.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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