And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize