just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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