i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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