I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I could fuck to npr.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Randomize
