Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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