"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
