Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize
