I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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