Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Where is the hickey?
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
