Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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