So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
