kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
