a search helicopter?!
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize