Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
