Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize