giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
