She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize