Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
