Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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