idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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