So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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