Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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