My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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